Paradise Lost
by honus47
Summary: COMPLETELY AU Takes place after Blame It On Rio. Season 7 episode 5. I used a different premise and I also used a stranger rather than using DiNozzo. There was NO Sidirov or Afghanistan.
1. Chapter 1

**Paradise Lost**

 **COMPLETELY AU** **Takes place after Blame It On Rio. Season 7 episode 5. I used a different premise and I also used a stranger rather than using DiNozzo. There was NO Sidirov or Afghanistan.**

A/N 1 I own nothing from NCIS LA with the exceptions of the characters I create in my mind.

A/N 2 This story starts out dark but it ends up bright.

A/N 3 I owe all of this story to my friend nherbie. She reviewed, and edited the entire story for me. She was the guiding light in my dark mind. Thanks lady!

Chapter 1

As much as it hurts her to think about it, everything changed in less than a minute. And the worst part is that she has no one to blame but herself. I was so happy and yet I gave that guy my phone number right in front of Deeks. What did I do that for? I love him, don't I? He's my everything and yet I gave that guy my number when he asked for it. I have no need to make Deeks jealous. He doesn't even look at other women. He hasn't for years now. What's wrong with me? Maybe I'm not ready to be with just one man? We were talking about the future last night and it really scared me. I gave that guy my number as a knee jerk reaction. It didn't hurt that the man was gorgeous. Not gorgeous like Deeks, but gorgeous none the less.

Deeks sits at his desk as he watches Kensi texting with someone most of the day. He just knows that it's the guy she met this morning **.** Deeks shakes his head, unable to look at her _._ "I can't do this."He mutters and he heads home for the day, leaving her alone in the bullpen. And she doesn't try to call him back because she knows he's right. This is her fault. It's _all_ her fault. She shouldn't have done it and now the man that means the world to her just left. All in less than one hour. And then she gets another text from the man she met this morning asking her out for a drink. She texts him back asking where and when, burying her feelings about Deeks.

That night, while sitting alone on her living room couch, with tears threatening to escape, she grabs the phone and dials the number of the only person she wants by her side right now. After two rings, Nell's' sleepy voice comes through the phone and she couldn't control her emotions anymore and she starts sobbing. "I need to talk to you Nell". Kensi's feeling really bad now, but she won't admit it out loud. Their relationship has been perfect. She can't even imagine what it would be like without Deeks in her life. They've been partners for almost 7 years and together for almost 1. They've been hiding it from everyone for almost a year now. Hetty knows about it of course, but the others only think they know. Why did I do that? Why am I so afraid of the future or _ANY_ future with Deeks that I would flirt with a complete stranger and then take his number? Worse yet, I actually went out to meet him for drinks and had fun. He said he would call and I said ok. Do I really want to do that? Do I actually miss the attention of all the men I used to get and can now do nothing about because I'm in a relationship? The only trouble I see from tonight is not once did I think of Deeks while I was having drinks with that guy.

He would be lying if he said he'd slept more than two hours last night. He'd walked out on Kensi yesterday. He's not sure why he'sso worried about it though because he did nothing wrong. But he's still sorry and that's the scary part. She had no right to do what she did. A part of him knows that Kensi must be sorry, and he's having a hard time trying to figure out what to do. That's why he doesn't even bother showing up for work. He calls Hetty to tell her he's taking some personal time and grabs his surfboard and heads to the beach. Maybe the waves will calm him down, like they always do. Maybe his heart will stop hurting.

After a sleepless night, she finds herself sitting on her couch thinking of her night out with that guy and wonders what to do. Her phone rings many times during the morning but she doesn't pick up. She's not in the mood to talk to anyone and calls Hetty to tell her she won't be in. Kensi spends the day thinking and crying. She'd cried in Nell's arms for hours late last night, and it's something she's not particularly proud of. After that, she told Nell to leave, that she was alright. It was a lie but Nell knew she needed some time alone and left without arguing. She let him down. She ruined everything and lost the one person whose loss she couldn't deal with. She knows he's not calling because he's hurt and angry with her.

After watching Callen and Sam stress about Kensi and Deeks' whereabouts for close to half the day, Hetty finally makes a decision and calls them both to her office.

Callen breaks his silence. "We're not blind, Hetty. Sam and I have the feeling that Deeks and Kensi are more than just partners. But what happened to cause all this?

Hetty sighs. "I'm afraid I don't know what started it all, Mr. Callen. I haven't had the chance to speak to either of them but Nell filled me in on a little of it this morning."

Sam frowns. "Nell knows?"

Hetty shakes her head. "This morning, Nell felt like I needed to know what was going on with my two agents. And I'm glad she told me."

Callen nods and sits on the chair across from Hetty's. "So Deeks is with Kensi?"

She was afraid of that particular question and hesitates before answering but both agents notice that. "Yes, they've been together for almost a year now."

Callen gets up and she can tell he's angry now. "Where is he?"

Hetty takes a deep breath. "You both need to promise me you won't go see him. He's done nothing wrong. Kensi was the one who broke the trust between them. Mr. Deeks said he couldn't handle what she did and left. Nell told me he hasn't called or said anything to Kensi since. I don't know where he is."

She notices Sam frowning and Callen's fists are curled, looking ready to hit something. So she reminds them. "You both need to promise me you won't do a damn thing. I expect you to make that promise especially since he did nothing wrong! Now, there's work to be done.

Callen and Sam walk to the bullpen and Callen grabs his phone. A grumpy voice answers on the other end but he couldn't care less about grumpiness right now. "Deeks walked out on Kensi. He hurt our little sister. I'm sending you his picture and he's more than likely surfing at Venice beach. He's all yours." After the phone call, Callen felt his anger abate a little.

"I'm going to Kensi's and check up on her Sam." He says to his partner. When he gets to Kensi's house, he finds that Nell is there already.

Nell asks him if he would like something to drink and he nods his head yes. Nell disappears into the kitchen to get him a cup of coffee.

"I keep telling her to go back to the mission, but she ignores me." Kensi says.

Callen nods. "That's because she's worried about you. We all are, Kensi."

Sadness so strong that she can't hide it takes over her features as she speaks. "Not everyone is . . . "

And he doesn't know what to tell her about that. Seeing her so broken, even for a few seconds, makes him want to break the promise he made to Hetty and rip Deeks apart. But, for some reason, he still worries that Deeks might have a good explanation for all this. After all, he's still someone who cares a lot about Kensi.

"I'm fine, Callen. You didn't need to come here."

He shakes his head. "Kensi, don't say you're fine because you can't be fine. Whatever happened between the two of you, you can talk to me."

She takes a deep breath and he sees some unshed tears on her eyes, tears she doesn't allow to escape. "We were standing in line to get coffee and I started flirting with a good looking guy and then he asked me for my number. I gave it to him Callen. And then throughout the morning, we texted back and forth and we actually set up a date for later that night. I went out for drinks with a man I just met. I did all that in front of the only man that has ever treated me decent. We've been together for almosta year Callen, and I did that to him. I still have no real reason why I did it either. Deeks has been nothing short of everything I have ever wanted or needed in a man. He's my everything and I treated him like last night's garbage and threw him away. This is my fault, Callen. So it's my burden to bear."

Those words shock him and he scoots closer to her. "Kensi, why would you ever do something like that? I don't think there's any coming back from something like that." And, just like that, she breaks down in his arms.

And Callen thinks of what he has done when he called Barth earlier and realizes he's made a terrible mistake. He tries to call Barth but the call goes directly to voice mail. Oh Paul, don't hurt him to bad, he thinks.

Deeks stays on the water until the cold water starts turning him into a shivering mess. So he gets out of the water and starts to dry himself off with his towel. His mind is somewhere else as he tries to think about anything but Kensi and what she did to him. It's not working because nothing can take his mind off of her. He notices a strange man walking towards him with a somewhat scary look on his face. As he grows close he says, "I was told you werea good man. But you hurt my little sister. You don't deserve someone like her."

That angers Deeks because he doesn't even know this man. "You don't know me and I don't know you. As far as I'm concerned, you have no business talking to me like that."

Deeks see the man's shoulder muscles tense up. This guy is getting ready to throw a punch. What the hell did I do? I don't know his sister. Hell, I haven't even really talked to another woman in almost 7 years. I didn't need to with Kensi at my side. The man tries to deliver a punch to his face but it never reached him. Deeks defends himself. He may look like a laid back surfer but he's been fighting to protect himself, and others, for most of his life. He blocks the punch with his forearm and while the arm was above his head, he uncoils a hard fist to the guy's ribs hearing one or maybe two crack. As the man bends over in pain, Deeks knees the guy in the face breaking his nose. The guy falls backwards. While Deeks was getting his phone out to call for LAPD, the guy gets up and comes at him again. WTF! He grabs the man's arm and twists it up behind his back, maybe a little too forcefully as he hears it pop out of the socket. He rolls the guy over, reaches into his bag, pulling out the twisty ties he always keeps with him and puts them on him, pulling tightly, and then tells him "You're under arrest for assaulting a police officer." He doesn't know who the hell just punched him or why the hell he threatened him but LAPD is going to book him and throw his ass into county lock up. 'What sister?' Deeks thinks to himself.

Nell sits next to Kensi, a few minutes after Callen leaves the house. She's not used to seeing her friend like this and it's not something that is easy for her to deal with. Kensi doesn't even look at her and it scares her because it only means she's shielding herself once again. "Kensi, you can talk to me. Why would you do that?"

She looks up and meets Nell's eyes. "I don't know Nell. But I did and I enjoyed it. I had a really good time with that guy and not once did I think of Deeks. Maybe what I thought was love, was just fondness?"

Nell disguises the sadness she feels upon hearing those words. "You should talk to him Kensi and figure out what you're going to do. It's not fair to either of you to try to stay together if you have any doubts."

Kensi shakes her head immediately. "I can't do that. I don't want to lose him Nell. And yet it really felt good when that guy asked me for my number."

Nell sees Kensi's eyes tearing up and sees her friend's effort to keep them at bay. "Kensi, you need to talk to him as soon as possible."

Kensi shakes her head once again. "I can't do that, Nell."

Deeks decides maybe he should go into work. He and Kensi can work out where to go with their problem. As soon as he gets to the mission, he notices Kensi's car isn't there. I hope she's not out on a case alone. He walks in and drops his bag off at his desk and right away Sam gets in his face. "What the hell did you do to Kensi, Deeks!?"

"Maybe you should ask her Sam. She's the one doing things." Deeks says and starts walking away towards the coffee machine.

Sam grabs Deeks shoulder and spins him around. Deeks isn't having any of it and removes his hand from his shoulder. "Don't ever grab me again Sam. There will be no warning next time"

"Yeah? Well, maybe somebody should teach you some manners then. You don't just walk away from people when they're talking to you."

"Sam, you weren't talking. You were yelling and accusing me of things I didn't do. So butt out of our business. And teach me some manners? Man, you need to get someone to teach you some. Don't you think?"

"What do you mean by that?"

"I mean that you're an uppity seal. There is no way except your way and anyone not acting exactly like you is not worthy of your respect! Well, that ends now. I won't take your shit any longer. It's time for you to realize that I have had your back for 7 years. I have never let you or anyone else down on an op and yet you still belittle me in front of others." Deeks thinks to himself that he should leave the area before something bad happens and decides to go to the gym. As he's knocking the stuffing out of the heavy bag, Sam shows up

"We need to talk Deeks"

"No, Sam, we don't. I have nothing to say to you." And then he went back to hitting the bag.

Sam sees red and grabs Deeks by the shoulder and spins him around again.

Deeks says "Sam that's enough! It's time you met the real Marty Deeks!" With that, Deeks took off his gloves, preparing to fight street style. "Come on Sam, show me what you got." Sam has never seen Deeks like this. His eyes are flat and there is no smile or sparkle, lifeless, like a shark. Sam has been waiting for this all morning, even thinking of it over the last 7 years. Finally. "Fine by me"

Just then, Hetty shows up. "Mr. Deeks, you WILL stand down!"

"No Miss Lange, I most certainly will not!" and proceeds to take care of Sam. As he leaves Sam laying on the gym floor, out cold, he shakes his head and leaves for home. Hetty watches him leaving and wonders if her Detective will ever be able to get over the hurt he's carrying in his heart and come back to them.

Later that day, Hetty receives a call from Barth letting her know he's been arrested for assaulting a police officer and is currently in jail. She decides to visit Deeks and see if she can straighten this fiasco out before it reaches catastrophic proportions. Hetty knocks on the door and waits patiently. She knows Deeks is home because his car and surfboard are there. He opens the door a few minutes later, a look she can't quite read on his face. Still, he lets her in without a word. Hetty sits on the couch across from him and says, "I heard you met Mr. Barth."

Deeks shrugs. "I have no idea who I met. A guy walked up to me and tried to punch me out. He said I hurt his little sister. I didn't Hetty. There hasn't been any other woman than Kensi. He didn't even say his name and I didn't ask. Do you know that guy?"

Hetty sighs. "Let's just say Paul Barth is an even more protective version of Mr. Callen when it comes to Miss. Blye. He was her partner when she first became an agent. I made Mr. Callen promise me he wouldn't come after you so I'm guessing he called Mr. Barth to do that. Now he's under arrest and in the hospital getting his dislocated arm fixed. I would like you to drop the charges against him. He's one of ours. Out of the San Diego office."

"Of course Hetty, right away" And he gets his phone and calls the precinct.

When he hangs up, Deeks takes a deep breath, "That was my last official duty for you and the LAPD. Tomorrow morning I'm resigning from them and will have the papers for you on your desk before the morning is over. I've taken a job with the FBI in their counter terrorism division. It's pretty much what I do now. I can no longer work with your team. When they need me, I'm good, when they don't need me, I'm the butt of all their jokes. And working with Kensi? That will never happen again. I lost all trust in her yesterday. I no longer trust anyone to have my back except myself. Just like the good old days."

Though it's more of a statement than a question, Hetty states, "I have to tell the team. They have the right to know."

Deeks nods but doesn't say another word. Understanding that he's not in the mood to talk, Hetty ends up leaving, praying Deeks has made the right decision.

A short while later the doorbell rings and Deeks opens it but, as soon as he sees who's there, he walks to his living room without so much as a word.

Nell closes the door behind her and walks in, noticing that Deeks won't even look at her. "You can look at me. I won't bite."

Deeks ignores her comment and doesn't dare to meet her eyes. "Why are you here?"

Nell sighs. "I promised Kensi I wouldn't do anything but you're both hurting and enough is enough."

His voice is low and Nell can hear the sadness in his voice. "You shouldn't have come. She'll be angry with you."

She walks closer to him and rests her hand on his back. "I know, but it's worth the risk. And I also know you won't look at me because you're afraid I'll be disappointed in you."

Deeks sighs and finally turns around, "Aren't you?"

Nell shakes her head. "No, I'm not. I get it. I can only imagine how hurtful this must be. But you need to get through this, together."

Deeks doesn't even try to disguise the hurt and the sadness he is feeling. "We were talking about our future the night before this all happened and she seemed so excited about how things were going. She should have told me if she was worried or afraid of it. But it's a moot point now. I took a job with the FBI in their counter terrorism division doing the same thing I do now. I don't know if I would ever be able to trust her again."

"Then you need to go talk to her right now. She needs you. Please, don't walk away when she needs you the most."

Upon hearing those words, Deeks tells her, "No Nell, there is no going back. I'm done with NCIS and the LAPD. I'm going where I'm actually wanted. I won't be having anyone telling me I'm just a cop, Or a partner that wants everyone to fall all over her as she walks into a room. She's reverting to the best first date girl in L.A. again Nell. She tossed me to the curb with her actions with that guy. It's best that I leave."

Nell collapses onto the couch and feels all the air in her lungs get sucked out. Oh Kensi, what have you done? Things will never be the same now. The team needed Deeks to balance it out.

The next morning, Deeks heads in to LAPD to see Lt. Bates. He signs his resignation papers and shakes his hand. Bates says, "I hope you're making the right decision kid."

Deeks looks him in the eye and replies, "I am. I just can't take the aggravation anymore. This is the right thing to do." He turns around and leaves. He drives straight to the mission trying to get there before the others. As he parks his truck, he notices that Callen is there but no one else. He gathers up his paper work and heads in. His first stop is to Hetty's office where he hands in his termination papers for the liaison position.

"I will miss you Mr. Deeks. Most sorely I might add." and she has a look of sadness on her face as he turns to leave. "You will always have a place here Marty."

"Thanks Hetty, but I don't ever see that happening again. I would, however, like to see you for a dinner or a drink occasionally if we're both available."

"I would also like that Mr. Deeks"

And with that, he heads over to his desk. He takes all of his personal things and throws them in the trash. The chocolate he has stashed, he drops onto Kensi's desk. Maybe she'll think of him one last time as she eats it he thinks and then he leaves the mission for the last time.


	2. Chapter 2

**Paradise Lost**

 **COMPLETELY AU** **Takes place after Blame It On Rio. Season 7 episode 5. I used a different premise and I also used a stranger rather than using DiNozzo. There was NO Sidirov or Afghanistan.**

A/N 1 I own nothing from NCIS LA with the exceptions of the characters I create in my mind.

A/N 2 This story starts out dark but it ends up bright.

A/N 3 I owe all of this story to my friend nherbie. She reviewed, and edited the entire story for me. She was the guiding light in my dark mind. Thanks lady!

 **** THIS CHAPTER IS SLIGHTLY NAUGHTY - BETWEEN A T AND AN M ****

 **Chapter 2**

Just a few hours later, the team was sitting at their desks with the exception of Deeks. Callen noticed Deeks's desk was cleaned of all personal effects and starts thinking bad thoughts. As he thinks of what it may mean, Hetty enters the bullpen.

"Mr. Deeks tendered his resignation as Liaison Officer early this morning, effective immediately, and no, he did not apply to become an agent." Hetty says.

"But why?" asked Kensi.

"Really, Miss Blye? You have to ask that after the way you treated him? "

Kensi at least had the decency to look ashamed, she knew that her vanity was the cause of all this. Maybe if she talks to him she can straighten things out. Because there is no one else she would ever want out in the field having her back!

"This team may not know this, but there have been numerous agencies after Mr. Deeks to join them. He has taken a position with the counter-terrorism division of the FBI. We will no longer see him sitting at his desk and I just want to personally thank you all for driving him away. Especially you Miss Blye. This team had the makings of greatness until now. You may not see it yet but you will and then you will appreciate what Mr. Deeks had brought to this team." As her tirade winds down, Hetty's anger abates. "I'm sorry I lost my temper, but . . ." And a tear rolls down Hetty's cheek and she turns to walk back to her desk.

The months fly by and before Kensi knows it, a year has come and gone. Kensi has a new partner. He's married, has 3 kids, and his wife used to be his partner before he took this position. She wonders how they do it. As partners go, he's alright. He's no Deeks, but he's good. She trusts him to have her back now and that's the main thing. She hears about Deeks from Nell and Hetty now and again. His exploits with the FBI have become extraordinary, almost legendary. They have never seen anyone closing cases as fast as he has been doing and his being a lawyer helps him out quite a bit also. They're extremely happy with his undercover work and have actually offered him a team of his own. He has really shined with them. This being a Friday, she's thinking of clubbing tonight or maybe tomorrow night. If she goes out tonight, she'll have two days to recover from her outing. Tonight it is as she looks forward to the thought of maybe finding a man to take her mind off things, off him. She goes out a couple times a month and she always finds someone to buy her drinks and dance with her. There was one that actually came home with her but he never made it past her living room. She was so drunk, she passed out. She really needs to scratch an itch and she hopes tonight is the night.

Callen finds it hard to believe that a year has come and gone. The team has grown dark. There's no banter anymore and it seems like missions take a little bit longer to complete. The team dynamics are off. I never thought I would say it, but I miss having Deeks around. Sure, the new guy is alright but he just isn't Deeks. I also worry about Kensi. She's reverted back to her actions pre-Deeks. She's become reckless again. Her partner has even commented on it. He's worried about her safety like Sam and I. Sam, he hardly ever speaks to Kensi and when he does, his speech is short and clipped. He blames her for everything. He's pretty much right on though. Deeks would still be here if it wasn't for Kensi's bone headed fiasco with some total stranger. Well, no sense in crying over spilled milk. We need to keep going and Callen wonders if there will be a case today.

Sam can't even look at Kensi anymore without his blood pressure rising. Everything was so nice before she went off the rails a year ago. Then again, we all had a hand in it I guess. If we would have asked Deeks before we flew off the handle, maybe none of this would have happened. But now what do we have? Four people that work together but don't really fit together. Hetty has told me she has tried countless times to talk Deeks into coming back but to no avail. He's very happy where he is. I bet he is to. No one he needs to worry about breaking his trust or his heart. I just wish he was still here. I'd like to see him once to see how he is. Maybe I'll talk to Hetty about that. I know he keeps in touch with her. The only one he keeps in touch with.

When Kensi gets home, she kicks her boots off and heads for her bed to take a little nap before going out. She wakes up a little after 8 pm and heads for the shower to get ready. She decides to wear her silk sheath dress without any underwear. The dress just barely covers her ass and fits her snugly. She curls her hair and lets it down framing her face. She puts her 'smoke' makeup on and looks in the mirror. All she sees looking back at her is sex on a stick. She looks hotter than hell and she isn't afraid to say so herself. Around 9:30 she calls a cab to go to the club. As she walks through the door of the club her head automatically swivels checking out the 'talent' walking around. She puts a little extra sway into her walk to see if anyone is biting. She sees several gentlemen look but then look away. Huh, she thinks, they must be married. She sits at the bar and asks for a jack and coke. Before the bar tender brings her drink back, someone slides onto the stool next to her and asks her if he could buy her a drink. As she swings her head to look at him, she sees that he's quite a bit older than she is. At least 10-15 years. Well, she thinks, until someone better comes along, she'll drink with him. "Sure thing." she tells him.

"Would you like to dance?" he asks

Kensi replies, "Yes" and gets off the stool and heads for the dance floor. She is pleasantly surprised to find the man can dance rather well. The night passes fairly fast and Kensi has a bit too much to drink. During one slow dance, he nuzzles her neck where it joins her shoulder and then licks on the shell of her ear. His hands drop down and squeezes her ass cheeks and Kensi just moans it feels so good. It's been so long and she really needs to get laid. He starts kissing her up and down her neck and she drops her hand down to his crotch to check out his equipment. Nothing to be proud of but it should do for what she needs. After the dance, they head back to the bar and have a few more drinks and before she knows it, it was time to leave. As they wait for their cab, he kisses her on the mouth and she kisses him back. His hand ventures north to her chest but she says not here in front of people. There will be time for that later

As they get to her house, they get out and head up to the door where Kensi tries to unlock the door but she's so drunk she can't get the key in the lock. He helps out and they get the door open and she stumbles through with him following. As soon as they shut the door, Kensi turns to him and starts to kiss him deeply and all of a sudden she pulls away and vomits all over him. As she wipes her mouth with her hand, she falls onto her couch and passes out. The guy looks at her, mumbles about her being a stupid drunk and leaves, wondering if he shouldn't have taken her anyway. Drunk or not.

When Kensi wakes up, her head feels like someone has set up a bowling alley and they're having a tournament. What did she do last night? Has she turned into the town drunk all of a sudden? She needs to stop this. She realizes now that clubbing is for the younger generation. It's time for her to clean up her act and straighten out. Then she heads for her bedroom and changes into her sleep wear and falls into bed and, once again, thinks of Deeks. If she ever has a chance at love again, she won't mess it up. Before sleep takes her she again thinks of Deeks and what a blunder she made.


	3. Chapter 3

**Paradise Lost**

 **COMPLETELY AU** **Takes place after Blame It On Rio. Season 7 episode 5. I used a different premise and I also used a stranger rather than using DiNozzo. There was NO Sidirov or Afghanistan.**

A/N 1 I own nothing from NCIS LA with the exceptions of the characters I create in my mind.

A/N 2 This story starts out dark but it ends up bright.

A/N 3 I owe all of this story to my friend nherbie. She reviewed, and edited the entire story for me. She was the guiding light in my dark mind. Thanks lady!

 **Chapter 3**

Hetty sits at her desk sipping her tea when her phone rings. Not her normal phone but her encrypted phone. She smiles right away knowing who the caller is. I think I will give him a little surprise and she smirks to herself. She picks up the phone and says, "Good afternoon Mr. Deeks. What do I owe for the pleasure of this call?"

"Now how could you possibly know it was me calling? Wait . . . you know what, never mind. I just called to let you know I'll be working in the LA area shortly. We're watching a cell that has been kidnapping young women from clubs to take overseas to hand out to suicide bombers. They use them the night before they blow themselves up and then kill them the next day. So, if it happens that anyone from your agency notices me, please ask them to ignore me as I'll be undercover."

"Of course Mr. Deeks. When are you starting your undercover operation?"

"I'm not sure yet Hetty. I need to acquire some more info and then set it in motion. It could be as early as this week although it's highly unlikely. I was thinking maybe you and I could have dinner one night this week before I go under. Do some catching up. What do you think?"

"I would like that Mr. Deeks. Just let me know when and where."

"I will Hetty. I'll call again no later than Wednesday morning. Ok?"

"That'll be fine Mr. Deeks. Talk to you then."

"Yes you will." and Deeks breaks the connection.

During the call, Kensi and Callen both watched her while she was on the phone and noticed how she looked. Whoever she was talking to must have meant something to her because of the way her face looked while she was talking. Callen thought to himself - DEEKS! It had to have been Deeks, and he smiles to himself. Kensi picked up on the way Hetty was acting on the phone also but didn't put it together who it might be. When she looked at Callen and saw his smile, she asked him about it. "Well? Who do you think it was?"

"It could be Deeks. He calls her now and again." Callen murmurs.

WAIT! He what now . . .? Calls her? Often? Kensi feels her heart take off hearing his name wondering if it truly was him Hetty was talking to. Oh if I can only see him or talk to him for a minute to try to explain that I need him back in my life. Who am I kidding? I have no life without him. He has taken over my dreams for quite some time now. With those thoughts running through her mind, she gets up and walks over to Hetty's desk.

"Good afternoon Miss Blye. May I help you?"

"Hetty, did you . . . have you . . . have you seen or heard from Deeks at all?"

"Well, dear, we've had dinner a few times when he's in town. And I talk to him on the phone fairly regularly, but again, only when he's not on a case. Why? Something on your mind?"

"Hetty, I need to talk to him, or see him, or . . . or . . ." She couldn't finish that thought. She continued "I really made a mistake a year ago and I want to try to rectify that. I miss him so much it hurts. Is there a way I can see him or talk to him?"

"Miss Blye, he made it abundantly clear the day he left here after resigning, that he in no way, shape, or form, wanted anything to do with you ever again. He was quite adamant about it. You hurt him worse than his father EVER did and it still weighs heavy on his heart. BUT, while I promised him I would never speak of it, he was shot on his last mission. He had infiltrated a drug cartel and the day of the take down, he spotted a woman who looked like you and it took his attention away from his task at hand. It distracted him just enough to allow her to get a shot off. So, I would hazard a guess that he still has feelings for you but is so afraid that he buries them deep inside. He doesn't want to be hurt like that again."

"Shot? Where was he shot? Was he in LA?"

"No dear. He was in Texas and he was shot in his shoulder. It was a major wound and he lost a lot of blood before his team got to him. He was mumbling something when they got to him. I was told it was your name."

Hearing that, Kensi completely lost it and started to cry. "Oh Hetty, I NEED to see him. He must still have feelings for me. I need to find out."

"He told me he would call me sometime tomorrow or Wednesday morning about setting up a dinner engagement for later this week. I'll talk to him about your desire to see him and see where it goes."

"Oh Hetty, please convince him to see me.

Wednesday morning, before the team comes in, Hetty's phone rings and as she answers it, she thinks of the two young lovers whose lives changed so much from a lapse in judgment. "Good morning Mr. Deeks. How are you this fine morning?"

"Just wonderful, Hetty, just wonderful. It looks like I'm going to be starting my mission this Saturday evening. I'll be at the Echoplex, on Glendale Blvd in Echo Park. That seems to be the place where most of the women have disappeared from. So maybe, if you have some free time, you and I can have dinner Friday night at Totoraku on Pico. I've heard they have excellent cuisine. That and the fact the owner knows me well."

"Mr. Deeks . . ., Marty, I have a very big favor to ask of you. I have an agent that is a basket case and is in dire need of help only you can give."

"Hetty, it's Kensi, isn't it? What's wrong with her? Can't one of the _'gorgeous'_ men at the clubs help her out? Why does it have to be me?"

"Mr. Deeks, tell me the truth. Do you have feelings for her yet? Do you think of her often? You know, I hired you all those years ago to put the two of you together. You're _made_ for each other. You must see that. Don't let a momentary lapse in judgment ruin something that could be so wonderful and good. Also, I don't know how much longer I can keep her on the team. She has become reckless. She takes chances she knows better NOT to take. When she goes out for a drink, she gets falling down drunk. She doesn't sleep well, and she's lost weight she can't afford to lose. What she did has caused all of that. To top it off, the team has suffered also. Cases still get solved but not as diligently as before. There is no levity any longer. Everyone is so staid. They all miss you."

"Hetty, I'm afraid of seeing her. I'm just starting to get over her and if I see her, I'm going to be back in the same boat that I'm trying hard to get out of. I love her to the point of distraction and yet she treated me like an old shoe and just threw me away. Why should we try again? How do I know another good looking guy won't turn her head? There's no going back if I see her. Ever since I first saw her at that MMA gym all those years ago, I've been in love with her. Fact is, I still love her with everything I am. This mission brought all those memories back. The women being 'taken' are replicas of Kensi and I see her each and every time I see a picture of the victim and my heart breaks." He paused as he fought his own desires and asked the woman he respected so much "So, Hetty, what are your thoughts on the matter? Should I see her or not?"

Hetty thinks a moment before answering her young friend and decides what would be best for the two of them. "I think you should see her Mr. Deeks. If you know she's at home while you're at the club, you'll know that the women you see aren't her. And if she sees you, she'll be home waiting and won't be out and about. It would be a win win."

"Ok Hetty. I'll see you Friday night at 7 pm at Totoraku on Pico."

Hetty thinks to herself, oh Marty, maybe you will and maybe you won't and smiles to herself.


	4. Chapter 4

**Paradise Lost**

 **COMPLETELY AU** **Takes place after Blame It On Rio. Season 7 episode 5. I used a different premise and I also used a stranger rather than using DiNozzo. There was NO Sidirov or Afghanistan.**

A/N 1 I own nothing from NCIS LA with the exceptions of the characters I create in my mind.

A/N 2 This story starts out dark but it ends up bright.

A/N 3 I owe all of this story to my friend nherbie. She reviewed, and edited the entire story for me. She was the guiding light in my dark mind. Thanks lady!

 **Chapter 4**

Marty hangs up the phone after talking to Hetty and his thoughts become scrambled. On one hand he dearly wants to see Kensi. On the other hand, he's worried things are going to go horribly wrong. He has never known real love in his life. He's never loved anyone so completely until Kensi. Now he knows what real, all-consuming love is. What she makes me feel, is so different from anything I have ever felt before. This is the woman I thought would be my one and done and then she tossed me to the curb. After all those years of being her partner and being together for almost a year, she just got rid of me like it was no big thing. What should I do? What should I say? Should I open my heart back up to her? Will she just rip my heart out again? Oh brother, I sure wish I had someone to talk to. Then a name jumps into his head, NELL! Nell and I were fairly close when I was with NCIS, maybe I'll call her and see if she can help me at all. She and Kensi are friends, or were, and of everyone, she would know her better than anyone. After he thought of that, he decides to open his laptop and do a little research on the upcoming mission, telling himself that he will call Nell later and maybe ask her out for dinner to talk about his little problem. Feeling better about the way things are going, he gets into his plans for the mission.

Later that day, Nell, Eric, and Kensi are sitting in ops looking for leads in their current case when Nell's phone rings. She picks it up and notices it's an unknown number so she cautiously answers, "Hello?"

"Hi Nell. It's Deeks. Do you have a minute to talk?"

Nell's eyes grow big and she looks at Kensi when she says, "Yes Marty, I have a few minutes. What can I do for you?" all the while watching Kensi turn bright red and looking anxiously at her.

"Nell, would you go to dinner with me tonight? I would like to talk to someone about Kensi and you're the only one I trust to tell me the truth. Hetty and I are having dinner Friday night and I believe Kensi is coming along. I just need to talk to you about things. Are you up for it?"

"Sure thing Marty. Where and when?"

"How about Rich's Diner? They have great Italian meals there. About 7 pm?"

"Unless something big comes up here at work, I will see you there then."

"Thanks Nell. See you later" and he breaks the connection.

When Nell hangs up the phone, Kensi is on her right away with questions. "What did he say Nell? What did he want? Where are you going? What . . ."

"Kensi! Stop! Take a breath and settle down. We're just going out for dinner is all."

"That's it? Nothing else? Why you and not someone else?"

"Well, maybe he wants to talk about you," Nell casually mentions and Kensi's heart takes off.

"WHAT!? ME?! WHY?"

"Kensi, I won't know until I get there."

"Well, where are you going? Maybe I should come along. I mean, if it's about me, I can answer his questions."

"Kensi, I said _MAYBE_ he wants to talk about you." And she turns to her computer screen and smirks.

"Maybe I should come along anyways. You know, just in case?"

"Kensi, I'll tell you all about it tomorrow. Ok?"

Kensi frowns and replies sadly, "Ok," and leaves ops.

Nell walks into Rich's promptly at 7 pm and looks for a head of blonde hair. Oh yeah, there he is and wanders over to the table. Deeks stands, gives her a big hug, and helps her to her chair and sits back down. As they make general chit-chat, Nell notices the way Marty looks. His eyes no longer sparkle like they used to and when he smiles, it never quite reaches his eyes. He looks a little haggard and appears to have lost some weight. His eyes never stop their searching as if they're looking for something or someone. And then a revelation strikes her, I think he misses Kensi as much as she misses him! After their meal, they have an after dinner drink and he opens up about Kensi and she hears the sorrow in his voice. If anyone is more suited to be together than these two, she wanted to meet them. She answers all his questions and asks some of her own and is surprised at his answers. Yes indeed! They belong together and she tells him that. They finish their drinks and decide to call it a night. "Thanks so much for your advice Nell. It was very helpful"

"I hope so. I firmly believe that if it's meant to be, it will be. I hope to see you again Marty." And walks to her car.

Deeks closes his laptop and thinks he has everything in place for tomorrow night's mission. He's hoping it goes down without a hitch but everyone knows, _the best laid plans of mice and men . . ._ and thinking that, he rubs the shoulder that he was shot in. As the day progresses, his mind fills with trepidation of his upcoming dinner engagement. He wonders if he has done the right thing agreeing to let Hetty ask Kensi to have dinner with them later this evening. Well, too late to cancel now and heads to the shower to start getting ready.

Kensi sits at her desk thinking of the upcoming dinner tonight and she smiles and her heart rate picks up. She feels like a teenager on her first date and smirks to herself. She knows she shouldn't get so excited, they used to work together for almost 7 years and were together for almost one before she went off the rails. I mean, c'mon, it's not some stranger, it's Deeks! And then unbidden thoughts crept into her mind. He was the one who trusted me the most, and in one moment in that coffee shop, she killed that trust and it was her fault. Not his, _HERS!_ As hard as she tries, she can't push those thoughts away from herself. It's going to take a lot of work and time to get things back the way they were but if he will let her, she'll try with everything she has. I want us back together again and she knows, deep down, that things will be alright. They're destined to be together, they just need to figure things out. They HAVE to! The alternatives are to bad to think about. Just then Hetty walks into the bullpen and states, "Since there are no cases, and your paper work is done, you may as well leave early. You all have a good weekend." She turns to Kensi and says, "I will see YOU tonight Miss Blye." and returns back to her office.

It's 6:15 pm and Marty is getting ready to leave for dinner. He looks at himself in the mirror to make sure everything is the way it should be. He decided to wear charcoal gray slacks with an ocean blue button down shirt and a jacket. Everything is good so he grabs his ID and puts his weapon behind his back and grabs his keys and out the door he goes. He's hoping he can get there a little early and have a drink to settle his nerves down. He can NOT believe how nervous he is. For crying out loud, it just dinner with Hetty and Kensi! As Deeks walks into the restaurant, the owner, Roger, spots him and walks over to him.

"Marty Deeks! Can my day get any better?" and pulls him into a big hug stating, "To what do I owe the honor of you stopping in tonight?"

"Thanks brother! I'm having dinner tonight with my ex-boss and ex-partner. I just thought I would try this establishment out again to see if it has improved any since the last time." And smiles so hard at Roger, his face almost splits.

"Marty, it's really good to see you again. Are you in town for long this time or just for today?"

"I really don't know Roger. I'm hoping that things are getting ready to change in my favor and I'll be back here for a long time. Tonight will tell me a little something about that."

"So, your ex-boss AND your ex-partner? Are they trying to get you to change job descriptions?"

"Well, it was intended to just be a catch up dinner with my old boss. I try to talk to her whenever I can for everything she did for me when I worked for her. My ex-partner is a whole different story. I was partnered with her for almost 7 years and we were together for almost one. She was, or, I should be honest here, she IS the only woman I will ever want or need in my life. But a year ago, there was a slight indiscretion made and we left under not so good terms. I THINK she may want to straighten things out, and that's why I picked here for dinner. I always feel good here and I need some of that right now."

"You know you're always welcome here Marty. For what you did for me and my wife, I'll never be able to repay you. I'll take care of you tonight, leave it to me." And Roger gives him another hug and brings him to his table.

As Deeks is sipping on his Jack and coke he sees Hetty walk in. He stands so she can see him and she waves and walks over. He gives her a hug and helps her to her chair. "Hetty, as always it's a joy to see you. Can I get you something to drink? A nice Scotch perhaps?"

"I would like that Mr. Deeks. So, I asked Kensi to come tonight but she decided to drive her own car. I got here a bit early to see you for a minute or so. Find out how things have been, how your shoulder is, how your upcoming mission is going, and check on your general wellbeing."

"Things couldn't be better Hetty. My shoulder has healed fine, just gives me a pause now and again but nothing I can't handle, and I have reason to believe that my mission will end tomorrow night. If the right guy is there, and we get him, it'll be all over, he's the king pin. And my wellbeing? That depends a whole lot on what happens here tonight with Kensi. I have a good life currently but it's not enough Hetty. I want a GREAT life and that will only happen if Kensi is in it." As he finishes his sentence, his eyes raise to the door and there stands Kensi. He loses his breath and his heart jumps into his throat. All of a sudden his mouth goes dry. Hetty picks up on it and smiles to herself thinking he must have seen Kensi. I may be leaving earlier than I had planned, she thinks and outright laughs. Hetty's short laugh breaks Deeks out of his stupor and he stands up to catch Kensi's attention.

Kensi sees Deeks right away and is completely blown away at his appearance. The way he's dressed weakens her knees. She heads to the table and he comes to meet her and helps her to her chair. Before she sits down however, she turns and gives him a small hug and a peck on his cheek.

As soon as Deeks feels her arms go around him, he reciprocates and puts his arms around her and all of a sudden he smells her, sunshine and gunpowder, and old memories come rushing back. His arms go all the way around her and he holds her like he never wants to let her go.

Feeling that, Kensi tightens her hold on Deeks and nestles into her old spot alongside of his neck and breathes in his scent. She feels like she's home again. It's a shame when he breaks the hug in order for them to be seated. She immediately starts scanning his features as he talks to Hetty, and notices his tan looks sallow. His eyes are slightly sunken and he has the beginnings of dark circles under his eyes. It looks like he has lost some weight and his hands jitter slightly. I wonder what happened to him to do this to him. Maybe the case he's working on now? I'll ask him later, she thinks.


	5. Chapter 5

**Paradise Lost**

 **COMPLETELY AU** **Takes place after Blame It On Rio. Season 7 episode 5. I used a different premise and I also used a stranger rather than using DiNozzo. There was NO Sidirov or Afghanistan.**

A/N 1 I own nothing from NCIS LA with the exceptions of the characters I create in my mind.

A/N 2 This story starts out dark but it ends up bright.

A/N 3 I owe all of this story to my friend nherbie. She reviewed, and edited the entire story for me. She was the guiding light in my dark mind. Thanks lady!

 **Chapter 5**

Dinner seems to fly by and before Kensi realizes it, they were ordering after dinner drinks. She was amazed at how well Hetty and Deeks got along. They chatted steadily throughout the meal about his current case and generalities. She also noticed NCIS was never mentioned, like his past job was off limits or something. I need to find out more about that she thinks to herself.

Hetty sees the glances that Kensi and Deeks are sharing and decides to call it a night and give them some time alone. "Marty, Kensi, I must take my leave for the evening as I have some early morning plans tomorrow. So, goodnight. I will talk to you soon Marty." Then gets up and exits.

Kensi is now watching him closely as she sees his hand just laying there on the table so very close to hers. Should I reach for it? See what happens? Just then he takes her thoughts away . . . He reaches for hers and holds it in his. He looks at her with a timid smile and her heart melts. How could I ever have done something so hurtful to this man? She grows timid under his gaze and looks away.

He reaches across the table and with his hand turns her head back to face him. "I kept thinking all day that having you come to dinner with Hetty and I tonight was a mistake. But seeing you, now, well . . . I still love you Kens, and I want us back again. You've been on my mind constantly lately and I realize that I need you in my life again."

Kensi feels so ashamed that she had acted on her fears that day a year ago. She honestly can't figure out why she was so scared of commitment. He was her world. It may have taken her a year to finally realize it, but she did love him deeply. "Deeks, I can't even begin to tell you how sorry I am, for what I did that day. I can't imagine how I can show you how much you mean to me. I can't bear the thought of losing you, I am so sorry I hurt you. I will do everything in my power to earn your forgiveness and have you with me always. Please, I need you to forgive me Marty."

"I don't want to push you away Kens. I want you here, I want you with me. It's all I ever wanted, having you by my side."

She looks up at him and moves her chair closer to his. "I love you Deeks. I really do. I've missed you so much."

He moves closer to her as well, bringing the distance between them much closer. Bringing both of his hands up to cradle her face, he leans over to her, brushing his lips softly to hers relishing the feel of her lips on his. "I love you Kensi, more than you'll ever know. Why don't we take this someplace a little more private? There are too many people here watching us."

"Whatever you say Deeks."

On the walk to their cars, Kensi's hand brushes up against his and without a seconds hesitation he wraps it in his.

Kensi's heart is beating a mile a minute with the realization that he still loves her and her face lights up with a huge smile.

As they reach her car, she turns to face him to ask him to come to her place for a drink but he has other things on his mind as he pulls her closer and one of his hands curls back to cradle her neck, tangling his fingers in her hair as his lips crush against hers longingly. His kiss is full of love and want for her. Kensi moans softly, adding to his needs as she kisses him back, wrapping her arms around his waist. The need for air seems to be a secondary need to him at that moment as he feels one of Kensi's arms sliding up to his neck and into his hair. Damn it felt good to be kissing her again. Just having her in his arms, made him feel alive again. As he kisses Kensi he thinks that all he needed was her. All he wanted was her love and he's totally amazed at the feeling of longing and love he's feeling. Slowly he pulls away from her, hating that he had to breathe. As he looks at Kensi's face as he moves back, he knew. Who was he kidding? He wanted her . . . needed her. They had taken the first step in fixing the past year tonight by talking to each other and they both came to the same conclusion, they both know that they belonged together. With his thoughts running rampant through his mind, the one that stuns him the most is the overwhelming need for his lips on hers as he dips in for another kiss. Deeks stands back and looks at Kensi in his arms, with love in his eyes.

As Kensi opens her eyes after the soul searching kiss Deeks had just given her, she sees the unadulterated look of love on his face, and her heart jumps into her throat. "Let's go home Marty."

"Ok." He says and then starts asking himself, where exactly _is_ home?

He follows Kensi in his car and realizes with a pang, where they're going. She stayed in his place after he left! As he parks alongside her car, his heart rate increases, thinking of what could follow. With no words, Deeks reaches his hand out to Kensi, pulling her in for a long, deep, kiss before silently walking to the house. As they stand in their old bedroom, Deeks reaches out to hold her in his arms and it hits him that _this_ is his future. Holding Kensi in his arms he knows she is his life, his everything. _His_ , the one he could grow old with. He is so completely in love with her. As the realization hits him, he is completely stunned. _She's mine!_

As he lay in the bed beside her in the early hours of the morning while she slept soundly, he can't help but stare at her, _his everything_. He reaches out and touches her shoulder, running his hand down her arm because he can't help but touch her. She makes a noise in her sleep that he knows means she is happy. She is soft and loving, gentle and caring. When they made love she was full of passion, the kind she had never shown anyone but him.

He kisses her forehead and rolls on to his side, pulling her into his arms and she moves herself into his body in her sleep. He welcomes her back into his life. He's happy that she's happy and he plans to make that happen every single day. Drifting off to sleep, a smile on his face, he knew everything would be ok.


	6. Chapter 6

**Paradise Lost**

 **COMPLETELY AU** **Takes place after Blame It On Rio. Season 7 episode 5. I used a different premise and I also used a stranger rather than using DiNozzo. There was NO Sidirov or Afghanistan.**

A/N 1 I own nothing from NCIS LA with the exceptions of the characters I create in my mind.

A/N 2 This story starts out dark but it ends up bright.

A/N 3 I owe all of this story to my friend nherbie. She reviewed, and edited the entire story for me. She was the guiding light in my dark mind. Thanks lady!

 **Chapter 6**

Saturday morning, Kensi wakes up with her body tangled up with Deeks. All she hears is the slow thump, thump, thump, of his heart as her head lay on his chest. She feels so alive and loved. Definitely loved, walking any distance today may be a chore. He must have missed me as much as I missed him. He was like a jungle cat . . . all night long. And thinking that brought a smile to her face. She snuggles into him a little more and goes back to sleep with a smile on her face.

Deeks feels the presence alongside him moving and cracks his eyes to see what she's doing. As he sees she's just snuggling closer, he tightens his grip around her and pulls her closer to him still and notices a smile appearing on her face. Huh, he thinks. _I'm_ the one that should be smiling. Sleeping with a naked Kensi Marie Blye? Oh HELL yeah! And drifts back to sleep.

As Deeks walks through the doors of the Echoplex club, he automatically checks his comm. and button cam to make sure everything is on. The two guys in the van outside tell him everything is a go. He's working with a partner tonight and it feels good to have someone watching things with him. "Jeremy, can you hear me?"

"I sure can Marty. Loud and clear. I got here about an hour ago and am currently sitting at a table at the front of the dance floor."

Ah, the joys of being young. He was energetic like that at one time also but now, not so much. "Good to know Jeremy. I'm at the bar. I'll hang back here for a bit." The Intel that Deeks received this afternoon let him know that the leader of the group was supposed to be here tonight so, if his luck holds, this op should be over tomorrow. He gives himself a moment to reflect on the past 24 hours and a smile graces his face. Oh Kensi, you took my heart right out of my chest yesterday. I sure hope I made the right decision by letting you back in. As he thinks more of Kensi, he happens to look at the mirror behind the bar and sees the man they're looking for and thoughts of Kensi disappear. He sees something alarming though, he's not alone. There are three of them and that has never happened before. Deeks thinks to himself that maybe this is the last grab before they move to a different town to start over again. "Jeremy, heads up brother. He has company with him. I count three all total. I'm thinking that this could be the final snatch and then they'll be heading to a different city. Be careful man."

"Will do Marty."

The two guys in the truck inform Deeks that they called in the FBI Swat team and he's happy about that. He just needs to wait until something happens. That's the hardest part of the op . . . the waiting. As Deeks sips on his Jack and coke, (mostly coke) he watches the leader talk to the two guys with him and after he's done, they split up. "Jeremy, there are two gentlemen coming your way. Both dark and swarthy. I think they've already singled out the women they're after. We need to see them grab them before we can do anything, so be careful."

"Roger that" Jeremy replies.

As Marty stands by the bar watching, the leader of the group walks over to him and nonchalantly whispers "Remember, promptly at 11:30 pm, not before. Allah have mercy on your soul." And he looks at Deeks and is very surprised. "Oh, I'm sorry sir, I thought you were someone else," and then walks away looking for something or someone.

Deeks has no idea of what that was about. Was he made? Is his cover blown? Was he being marked? "Jeremy, the leader was just talking to me about something happening tonight at 11:30. He thought I was someone else. Be very careful Jeremy."

"Wow, how could he think you were one of them? I mean, you look straight up California surfer. Whoa, heads up Marty. I just saw one of those guys slip something into a girls drink. All of a sudden she's draped all over him and he's leading her out of the side door."

The SWAT commander lets them know, "We'll pick him up as soon as he leaves the building Jeremy."

"Roger that Lieutenant," Deeks is very glad that SWAT is here. A few minutes later, the SWAT commander calls him over his comm. and lets him know he has two of them in custody and the girls are on the way to Pacific Beach Medical to get checked out. They still need to get the leader though. As soon as he thinks about that, he notices the leader talking to a guy that looks quite similar to himself. Man, he thinks, he could pass as my brother and starts walking in their direction. As Deeks walks towards the men, the leader sees the look on Deeks's face and reaches for his gun.

Deeks yells "GUN!" and then feels something hit him in the stomach. He looks down and sees a spot of red showing up on his stomach and his legs grow weak. As he falls to the floor, he feels another shot take him high up in his chest. As he looks at the leader, he sees him reaching for the blonde guy standing by him and pulls a cord on the guys chest. The whole place goes up in a bang and Deeks blacks out, never feeling the table that lands on him or the ceiling falling on him

After Deeks left for the FBI headquarters to get things squared away for his op tonight, Kensi calls Nell to see what she's doing. "Nell, since Eric is game-festing Call Of Duty tonight, want to have a girls night?"

"Sure," Nell replies, "Here or at your place?" She queries.

"Well, I have Rocky Road ice cream and beer here. Soooo . . . come on over."

"I'm on the way Kensi." And Nell grabs her keys and heads out the door.

As soon as Nell walks into Kensi's place, Kensi lets her know, "Nell, I have some great news and some greater news."

"What's the great news?"

"Well, I went to dinner with Hetty and Deeks last night and things were good. After Hetty left, we talked and kissed, and kissed and talked, and . . . well, you get the idea." and Kensi can feel the red crawling up her face.

Nell is perplexed as she inquires, "If that's the _great_ news, what could possibly be the greater news?"

"He stayed here last night and all morning before he had to go to work. And it was beyond special." Nell can see Kensi's face turn red again and her eyes get that faraway look in them and she knows everything is going to be alright between the two of them again.

They eat the ice cream and talk, mostly about Deeks and then Kensi's phone rings. She looks at her watch and wonders who could be calling at 11:45 at night and thinks, DEEKS! Maybe the op is done. Kensi grabs her phone and answers it, "Blye."

"Is this Kensi Blye?"

"Yes," Kensi answers, "Who is this?"

"This is Dr. Andrews at Pacific Beach Medical hospital. You're listed as next of kin to Martin Deeks. I think you should come to the hospital. Mr. Deeks has had an accident and we would like you to be here just in case."

"Accident? What sort of accident?" And Kensi is finding it harder and harder to breathe.

"Mr. Deeks has been shot and involved in an explosion of some type. He's in surgery right now, but his chances aren't looking very good. Please, if you could hurry?"

"Of course. I'm on the way but it's going to take me 20 or 30 minutes."

"Just hurry Miss Blye." And the line disconnects.

"Kensi? What's wrong?"

"Deeks has been shot."

"I'll drive. Let's go."

When they arrive at the hospital, they're ushered into the waiting room. Kensi had been named as Deeks's next of kin, and the nurses tells her that he's currently in surgery for gun-shot wounds to the upper chest and lower torso, several broken ribs, and some cracked ones. She completes the paperwork they'd handed her, grateful that at least she could do something. For 5 hours they sit there, each offering their own silent pleas to whoever was listening upstairs **,** that Deeks make it through this. Kensi remains quiet, determined to not break down. Because if he didn't come out of this, if he . . .

"Family of Marty Deeks?" Kensi stands up saying, "Yes, that's us. How is he? Is he okay? Is he . . ." She couldn't say it.

"Yes Ms. Blye, he's alive. He coded on the table twice before the surgeons even started on him but after they got him back and stable, he made it through the surgery just fine No complications. The bullet to his upper chest went through his lung, collapsing it, so we intubated him. We'll need to keep him in ICU for several days, to make sure there's no further complications and then he can be moved to a regular room. Only one person will be allowed in the room at a time right now. If you both follow me, I'll take you to his room. I'll bend the rules a little tonight and let you both in for a bit, but only one can stay."

As they near his room Kensi starts finding it hard to breathe. She's seen him in a hospital room too many times since she's known him and she doesn't like it, not one bit. When they enter his room, Kensi sees all the wires and monitors adorning his body and the tube in his mouth. If it wasn't for the beeping of the heart monitor, she would swear he was dead. He looks so still and pale that it breaks her heart. She just wants to hold him in her arms and kiss him silly but knows that won't happen for some time yet. She decides she won't leave his side until he wakes up. I will fight for him this time. He belongs to me and I'm going to make sure he knows that. She pulls a chair up close to the bed and holds his hand in hers and says a prayer to help him get through this.

After an hour, Nell decides she should leave as it's almost 6 am. She tells Kensi she's going to leave, gives her a hug, and leaves the room.

Waiting . . . that's all Kensi could do right now. She wishes for some kind of movement from Deeks, but it isn't looking very promising right now.


	7. Chapter 7

**Paradise Lost**

 **COMPLETELY AU** **Takes place after Blame It On Rio. Season 7 episode 5. I used a different premise and I also used a stranger rather than using DiNozzo. There was NO Sidirov or Afghanistan.**

A/N 1 I own nothing from NCIS LA with the exceptions of the characters I create in my mind.

A/N 2 This story starts out dark but it ends up bright.

A/N 3 I owe all of this story to my friend nherbie. She reviewed, and edited the entire story for me. She was the guiding light in my dark mind. Thanks lady!

 **Chapter 7**

As Sam and Callen get to Deeks's room door, they both notice Kensi holding onto his hand with her head resting on the bed. Sam looks at Callen and states the obvious, "It looks like something happened that you and I know nothing about."

"You think they're together again? It would sure make things good again if that were true."

"Well, let's go in and find out," Sam smiles and opens the door.

Hearing the door open, Kensi snaps her head up and looks around. Her eyes zero in on the bag in Callen's hand and the cup in Sam's.

"Hetty called us earlier and mentioned that you may be here and we should get you something to eat. We got you a couple breakfast burritos and a cup of that liquid you call coffee that you like so well. Oh, yeah, and there may be a doughnut or two in there too." As soon as Callen says that, she snatches the bag out of his hand and devours a doughnut. She can't remember a doughnut tasting so good before.

Sam and Callen watch the eating machine they call Kensi fondly. She has half of the second cream filled delight almost gone and looks content, happy even. Sam thinks to himself, yep, her 'Deeks' is back. Things are going to get very interesting now he thinks and then laughs out loud.

"What's so funny Sam?" Kensi asks.

Sam raises his hand and points a finger between her and Deeks and asks, "What's going on here Kensi? You have anything you want to tell me and G?"

"Nope." And Kensi pops the p and smiles to herself.

As the three are talking, Jeremy enters the room and they all turn to him.

"Hi," Jeremy says, "I'm Jeremy Martin. I was Marty's partner last night. I thought I'd stop in and see how he's doing. By the time we found him last night, no one thought he was still alive. When we pulled the last bit of debris off of him, his eyes opened for just a second and he told us to get Kensi and then passed out. Would that be you?"

"I'm NCIS Agent Callen, and this is my partner, Sam Hanna. The lady holding Deeks's hand is his ex-partner Kensi Blye."

"It's nice to finally put faces to the names. He talks about you all and the fun he used to have annoying Agent Hanna. And Kensi? Shoot, whenever he sees a brunette he mentions your name and he gets a strange look on his face."

Hearing that, Kensi's face gets red and she smiles. He _DID_ miss me . . . _DOES_ loves me . . . "Really?" she asks.

"Yeah, since he was shot, he talks about all of you more than before, especially you Kensi."

"Shot?" Sam exclaims.

"He was shot on his last op in Texas on a drug bust that went sideways. Hetty told me about it earlier this week before we went out Friday night for dinner." Kensi interjects.

Jeremy jumps in with, "We were partners for that op too. Pretty deep cover and we were doing great but someone who should have still been behind bars, happened to show up and made Marty and then the crap hit the fan. It sounded like a warzone for a minute but the back-up got there in the nick of time. With all the shootin' going on, we had no idea that Marty'd been shot. By the time we realized he wasn't with us we started looking in the warehouse where the activities all started. We found him behind some crates in a pool of blood. There again, his first words were 'Kensi, get Kensi'. We didn't have a clue who that was. Now we know."

That was the final straw. The tears start running down Kensi's cheeks and she looks at Deeks, "You come back to me Marty Deeks! Do you hear me? You come back to me!" and buries her head on the bed and breaks down.

The floor nurse stops in and mentions that there is only supposed to be one person in here with Mr. Deeks at a time and that they should leave before the Doctors start their rounds. Before she can leave the room, Callen asks her, "How's he doing?"

She answers with, "He has three GSW's. One in his upper chest that was a through and through. That was the one that collapsed his lung. The two in his stomach caused some problems but not as bad as the Doc expected. He has three broken ribs on his right side and several cracked ones on his left. He's lucky to be alive. He coded three times. Once in the ambulance and twice on the table before the surgeons even started on him. We're waiting until he wakes up to find out how his ribs got hurt the way they are. It's strange to have both sides hurt like that."

"I can shed some light on that," Jeremy states. "When Marty yelled gun, Hakim shot him and then reached to the chest of a blonde guy standing by him and pulled a cord. The explosion blew Marty up against a column on his left side. There was a heavy table that flew at him also and hit him in the right side. Being pinned against the column, it broke his ribs. To top it all off, the damn ceiling fell on him."

Callen looks at Sam and says, "We need to get him back on the team with Kensi. We need to convince him to come back to us."

Jeremy hears that and gets a strange feeling in the pit of his stomach. He doesn't want to lose his partner, his friend, but seeing them all together, he can see the closeness between them. These four people belong together. He frowns and shakes his head knowing the FBI is more than likely going to lose him back to NCIS. "Well, gentlemen, Kensi, I need to get to the office. That blonde guy that had the vest bomb on, I believe he was a home grown terrorist. Even though we took out the leader and his two henchmen, we're still going to put out some feelers to our CI's to find out a little more about that particular cell. Monday morning is going to be very busy I think." And saying that, he takes his leave.

Sam tells Kensi, "I'm going to take off also Kensi. I promised Michelle I'd take her and Kamran to the park today. I have a feeling we may be pretty busy tomorrow. How 'bout you G? Ready to leave?"

"Yeah, I promised Joelle we'd have a quiet day together today. We'll see you tomorrow Kensi." And they both leave.

Later in the morning, Hetty shows up at Deeks's room. As she enters the door she notices Kensi holding Deeks's hand and her shoulders are shaking. As soon as Kensi hears the door open her head picks up and Hetty sees that she's been crying. "Miss Blye . . . Kensi . . . whatever on earth is wrong?"

"Oh Hetty," she sobs, "I'm so ashamed of my actions this past year. How can he ever forgive me for those? I almost brought a strange man back to my bed twice. Had I not passed out, I would have made a terrible mistake."

"But you did pass out my dear. What's that old saying? No harm no foul? You were just lashing out for your loss, the loss you didn't even know about until lately. You lost your Mr. Deeks. But, I can see you have found him again. That dinner Friday night must have been something!"

"It was Hetty. He forgave me and told me he still loves me."

"Miss Blye, let me tell you a little story. You need to keep this to yourself though."

"Of course I will Hetty."

"After that MMA op we had when we first met Mr. Deeks, I knew I wanted him as an agent. I could tell from the first time I saw you and him together that there was something special going on between you. So after the mission was over, I met him in a local bar where he was drowning his troubles in a cup of coffee and offered him the job of Liaison with us. He told me that if he could partner with you, he would sign right then. Of course I told him yes. That was my plan all along, although I didn't tell him that part. He signed the form and that was that. I've watched the two of you grow closer and closer over the years until you culminated your love for each other. Another tid-bit of information for you is the fact that all those 'dates' he supposedly went on, were all fiction. He would spend the time with his friend Kip. Since you two met, he has never looked at anyone else other than to flirt to keep up appearances. It's always been only you. He told me you looked into his soul and stole his heart."

Kensi didn't know what to say. Her breath was ragged, her heart was pounding, her skin was turning various shades of red, and she knew; she was his also, body and soul and she was going to tell him as soon as he woke up. "I need to get him back as my partner Hetty. How can I ever do that? He told me he was happy running his own team for the FBI."

"My dear, I believe all you need to do is ask him. That's all it will take. Don't you see that? Just ask him. Now then, you need to go home and get some good sleep, good food, and then come back tomorrow morning. The Doctor told me they're going to wean him off the sedation tomorrow so he wakes up and they're going to take the tube out so he can breathe on his own. I would think you would want to be here for that. Once he awakens, we'll decide what to do about your visitation. If we have no case pending, I can see no reason for you not to be here the rest of the week."

" I want to be with him a little longer today Hetty. I'll go home later, I promise."

"Ok my dear," Hetty sighs and gathers her things to leave.

Later that afternoon, Kensi leaves and stops on the way home for some Korean take out. As soon as she gets home, she grabs a beer, a fork, turns on the TV and digs in. She hadn't realized how hungry she actually was. With a full belly, she relaxes into a hot bath and lets all her worries melt away. When she's done, she can hardly keep her eyes open so it's off to bed she goes. She collapses on the bed and she smells him right away. The pillow he slept on has his scent so she grabs it to cuddle with and goes to sleep with him on her mind.

When she wakes up Monday morning, she finds it hard to believe she slept so long. It was the most restful sleep she has had in a long time and it was all because of his scent on the pillow. Then she remembers that she needs to get to the hospital because they're going to wake him up today. I need to see those eyes of his she thinks and her face flushes again.

When she walks through the door to Deeks's room, she spots two nurses hovering around 'her' Deeks. Wondering what's going on, she asks, "Excuse me, but is there something wrong with my boyfriend?"

"Um, no, not really. We were just checking him out . . . No, I meant checking up on him. Making sure he didn't need anything." The nurse stammers.

"Does he?"

"Nope, not a thing." The other nurse quips and they leave post haste.

About two hours later as Kensi is holding his hand, she feels his finger twitch. Oh, it won't be long now and he'll be back with me. A short while later, she feels him squeeze her whole hand and she finds herself looking at his eyes hoping they open soon. Instead, she hears something that breaks her heart. "Please Kens, don't do it. Stay with me . . . don't go." And then he quiets back down. She thinks he must be dreaming of the day in the coffee shop a year ago. How will I ever make that up to him she wonders and her eyes fill with tears.

Several hours later and she hears him groan a bit, like he's starting to wake up and stretch sore muscles. She quickly stands and fluffs her hair out, because he likes it like that, and looks at his face waiting for his eyes to open. When they open, they're flat, no sparkle and she wonders what happened, but then, she sees the sparkle come. He just needed to wake all the way up and recognize me. Two massive pools of cobalt water that a girl can get lost in and I'm going to make sure they stay mine.

"Kens? What happened to me? I feel like I was shot and blown up."

"That's because you were Marty. But you're getting better now."

"Really? Again I get shot? I really have to stop doing that. It really hurts." He groans.

"Don't forget the blown up part either. That can't feel very good." And then she giggles.

"Did I just hear Kensi Marie Blye giggle like a little school girl?"

"Maybe." She says with a timid smile. "I can't wait," she says, "I need to kiss you . . . NOW!"

"Ok, but take it easy. I've been blown up and sho . . . " And her lips cut off the last of his words.

A little while later, Kensi works up the nerve to ask him an important question. "Deeks, I need a partner. Not just in my life, but in work also. Can you do that for me? Come back to me? For everything?"

"Kensi, are you asking me to come back to NCIS AND to be together with you again?"

"Yes. I need you. I can't function without you around me. Please come back to me?"

"Ok. But Hetty needs to ask to make it legal and all."

Hearing that, Kensi pulls the paper work out that Hetty has already filled out. His resignation from the FBI and the papers to becoming a senior field agent with NCIS OSP. He signs them with a flourish and goes back to mild necking with Kensi.

2 months later Deeks is sitting at his old desk taking a load of grief from the members of his old team. "So, Deeks, how was it working for the dark side?" Callen asks.

"Well Callen, not too much different than working here. Someone brought me a coffee in the mornings, another person brought me a bran muffin now and again, but the biggest difference between the two places was," He stands up, walks over to Kensi, stands her up, gives her a hug followed by a kiss then turns to the others and says, "they didn't have a Kensi Marie Blye."

The End


End file.
